10 Signs Your Guy Hates Shopping

Here Are 10 Signs That Your Guy Hates Going Shopping With You.

1. You catch him staring into the store's security cameras, waving his arms in the air and mouthing:   "Help me!"
   
   
2. In the last year of hitting the mall together, he's gained 20 pounds trying to self-medicate on cheese fries from the food court.
   
   
3. He sleeps like a baby . . . in Victoria's Secret.
   
   
4. The store's lounge area has turned into a therapy circle for men, with your Guy acting as moderator.
   
   
5. You catch him shooting the breeze about baseball and trying to place an eighth-inning bet . . . with a mannequin.
   
   
6. On trips to the shopping outlets,he routinely grabs the arms of little boys and shouts " run for your life, child, before it's too late"
   
   
7. When you suggest he bring a magazine to read to pass the time, he lugs an entire year's worth of back issues.
   
   
8. The saleswoman at the cosmetics counter has complained that your man is a little to fond of "smelling" the nail polish testers.
   
   
9. He starts shoplifting  in an attempt to "spice things up"
   
   
10. You hand him a pair of khakis you think might look good on him, and he absentmindedly fashions then into a noose.

[ Author Unknown -- from 'Arizona Humor' Bill Austin (baustin@worldnet.att.net) ]