Biblical Stories - Today's Media

If today's media got a hold of these Biblical stories . . .

• On Red Sea crossing:
       WETLANDS TRAMPLED IN LABOR STRIKE
               Pursuing Environmentalists Killed
  
  
  
• On David vs. Goliath:
       HATE CRIME KILLS BELOVED CHAMPION
              Psychologist Questions Influence of Rock
  
  
  
• On Elijah on Mt. Carmel:
       FIRE SENDS RELIGIOUS RIGHT EXTREMIST INTO FRENZY
                400 Killed
  
  
  
• On the birth of Christ:
       HOTELS FULL, ANIMALS LEFT HOMELESS
                Animal Rights Activists Enraged by Insensitive Couple
  
  
  
• On feeding the 5,000:
       PREACHER STEALS CHILD'S LUNCH
                Disciples Mystified Over Behavior
  
  
  
• On healing the 10 lepers:
       LOCAL DOCTOR'S PRACTICE RUINED
                "Faith Healer" Causes Bankruptcy
  
  
  
• On healing of the Gadarene demoniac:
       MADMAN'S FRIEND CAUSES STAMPEDE
                Local Farmer's Investment Lost
  
  
  
• On raising Lazarus from the dead:
       FUNDAMENTALIST PREACHER RAISES A STINK
                Will Reading to be Delayed
  
  

[ Kevin Rayner (http://groups.yahoo.com/group/off-the-church-walls) ]