Change a Light Bulb

1. Q: How many consultants does it take to change a light bulb?
   A: I'll have an estimate for you a week from Monday.
   
   
2. Q: How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?
   A: One-third less than for a regular bulb.
   
   
3. Q: How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
   A: Two: One to screw it almost all the way in and the other to give it a surprising twist at the end.
   
   
4. Q: How many boring people does it take to change a light bulb?
   A: One.
   
   
5. Q: How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
   A: Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a cosmos of nothingness.
   
   
6. Q: How many Orthodox Rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?
   A: Change?
   
   
7. Q: How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
   A: That's not funny!
   
   
8. Q: How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?
   A: None. It turned itself in.
   
   
9. Q: How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
   A: Only one, but it sure takes a truckload of light bulbs!
   
   
10. Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A: Three: One to find a bulb specialist, one to find a bulb installation specialist, and one to bill it all to Medicare.
    
    
11. Q: How many Marxists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A: None: The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
    
    
12. Q: How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: Seven: One to install the new bulb, and six to figure what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
    
    
13. Q: How many college football players does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
    
    
14. Q: How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A: None.... There never *was* any light bulb, don't you remember?

[ Author Unknown -- from 'Buffalos Chips' (buffalos-g-jokes.yahoogroups.com) ]