How to speak English Properly
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Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
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Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
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And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
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It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
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Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat)
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Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
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Be more or less specific.
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Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
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Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
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No sentence fragments.
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Contractions aren't necessary and shouldn't be used.
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Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
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Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
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One should NEVER generalize.
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Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
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Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
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One-word sentences? Eliminate.
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Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
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The passive voice is to be ignored.
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Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however
should be enclosed in commas.
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Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
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Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
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Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth
earth-shaking ideas.
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Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations.
Tell me what you know."
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If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist
hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
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Puns are for children, not groan readers.
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Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
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Even IF a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
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Who needs rhetorical questions?
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Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
And the last one...
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Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
[ Author Unknown -- from 'Cleanlaugh' ]
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