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Old Farmers Advice
Words of wisdom:
- Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance.
- Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.
- A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.
- Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.
- Meanness don't jest happen overnight.
- Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.
- Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.
- It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.
- You cannot unsay a cruel word.
- Every path has a few puddles.
- When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
- The best sermons are lived, not preached.
- Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.
- Don't judge folks by their relatives.
- Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
- Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.
- Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.
- The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm, 'cause the colder it gets, the harder it is to swaller.
- If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
- It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
- Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.
- The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with watches you shave his face in the mirror every mornin'.
- Always drink upstream from the herd.
- Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.
- Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.
- If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.
Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.
[ Author Unknown -- from Hart Dowd (hsdowd @ telus.net) ]
Inspirational Humor
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