Why I Like Retirement!

And They Ask Why I Like Retirement ...

1. Question: How many days in a week?
   Answer:    6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday.
   
   
2. Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?
   Answer:   Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.
   
   
3. Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb?
   Answer:   Only one, but it might take all day.
   
   
4. Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
   Answer:   There is not enough time to get everything done.
   
   
5. Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?
   Answer:   The term comes with a 10% percent discount.
   
   
6. Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
   Answer:   Tied shoes.
   
   
7. Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
   Answer:   They are the only ones who have the time.
   
   
8. Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
   Answer:   NUTS!
   
   
9. Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
   Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.
   
   
10. Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
    Answer:   Normal.
    
    
11. Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?
    Answer:   The never ending Coffee Break.
    
    
12. Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
    Answer:   If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.
    
    
13. Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with?
    Answer:   He is too polite to tell the whole truth.
    
    AND My favorite one:
    
    
14. QUESTION: What do you do all week?
    Answer: Mon to Fri. Nothing - Sat and Sun I rest!

Share this one with all the retirees that you know.  I'm sure they can relate to some of them!  AND, If you have not yet retired, look what you have to look forward to.

[ Author Unknown -- Jim, via 'Buffalos Chips' (buffalos-g-jokes.yahoogroups.com) ]