Yooper Airlines
We Are Pleased To Announce Yooper Air Is Now Operating In
Minnysota. Also Serving Visconsin, Nort And Sout Dakota and da U.P.
in Mitchegan. If you are travelin soon, consider Yooper Air, da no-frills airline.
You're all in da same boat on Yooper Air, where flyin
is a upliftin experience.
Dere is no first class on any Yooper Air flight.
Meals are potluck. Rows 1-6, bring rolls; 7-15, bring a salad; 16-21,
a main dish, and 22-30, a dessert. Basses and tenors please sit in da
rear of da aircraft.
Everyone is responsible for his or her own baggage. All fares are by
free will offering and da plane will not land 'til da budget is met.
Pay attention to your flight attendant, who will acquaint you wit da
safety system aboard dis Yooper Air.
Okay den, lesten up. I'm only gonna say dis vonce. In da event of a
sudden loss of cabin pressure, I am frankly going to be real
surprised and so vill Captain Olson, because we fly right around two
tousand feet, so loss of cabin pressure vould probably mean da Second
Coming or someting of dat nature, and I vouldn't bodar with doze
liddle masks on da rubber tubes.
You're gonna have bigger tings to worry about den dat. Just stuff
doze back up in dair little holes. Probably da masks fell out
because of turbulence which, to be honest wit you, we're going to
have quite a bit of at two tousand feet, sorta like driving across a
plowed field, but after a while you get used to it.
In da event of a water landing, I'd say forget it. Start saying da
Lord's Prayer and just hope you get to da part about forgive us our
sins as we forgive doze who sin against us, which some people say
trespass against us,' which isn't right, but what can you do?
Da use of cell phones on da plane is strictly forbidden, not because
daymay confuse da plane's navigation system, which is done by da seat
of da pants all da way. No, it's because cell phones are a pain in da
wazoo, and if God meant you to use a cell phone, He would have put
your mout on da side of your head
We start lunch right about noon and it's buffet style with da coffee
pot up front.
Den we'll have da hymn sing; hymnals are in da seat pocket in front
of you. Don't take yours wit you when you go or I am going to be real
upset and I am not a kiddin!
To understand this ~ it really helps if you are from
Mitchegen........ Ya........ eh?
[ Author Unknown -- Kathleen, via 'Buffalos Chips' (buffalos-g-jokes.yahoogroups.com) ]
Inspirational Humor
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