It Will Not Be Forced

It seemed like Christmas came too fast for me again this year,
I was not even ready for it and it's almost here.
I never got around to baking as I usually do,
And there are decorations that I never will get to.

I still had shopping to be done I was so far behind,
Trying to get in the spirit made me lose my mind.
I never was behind like that on any given year,
And that I would run out of time was then my biggest fear.

I used to stroll throughout the mall with choices I was making,
And listen to the Christmas music while enjoying baking.
But even when I did go shopping all day I just ran,
And never did I think I would have time to touch a pan.

I know I'm not the only one who feels the way I do,
I've talked with others who confessed they feel the same way too.
What happened to the spirit of the Christmas holiday?
All the years before this I had never felt that way.

This year it all seems hectic I just can't get in the spirit,
And as for sending out the cards I did not want to hear it.
Never had I felt this way on any Christmas past,
I always wanted Christmas just to linger and to last.

Is it world events has changed me making me feel colder?
Or is it getting in the spirit fades when you get older?
Excitement would not come this year as in the years before,
Maybe it's because this year our country is at war.

I tried so hard to force myself to enjoy and relax,
But forcing Christmas spirit brings anxiety attacks.
I had to think of something that would get me in the mood,
I had to find the reason for that "humbug" attitude.

Then all at once it hit me like a fallen ton of bricks.
I tried too hard to find the answer for an instant fix.
You can't get in the spirit using presents and a tree,
I had to calm my heart and let the spirit come to me.

The way I tried to get the spirit was backwards of course,
I had tried again to put the cart before the horse.
You can't get in the spirit trying all the things we do.
The secret of the Christmas spirit... Let It Come To You.

[ by James A. Kisner © 2001 (PoppyK1@aol.com) -- {used with permission} ]