When I'm A Little Old Lady

Then I'll live with my children
and bring them great joy.
To repay all I've had
from each girl and boy
I shall draw on the walls
and scuff up the floor;
Run in and out
without closing the door.

I'll hide frogs in the pantry,
socks under my bed.
Whenever they scold me,
I'll hang my head.
I'll run and I'll romp,
always fritter away
The time to be spent
doing chores every day.

I'll pester my children
when they are on the phone.
As long as they're busy
I won't leave them alone.
Hide candy in closets,
rocks in a drawer,
And never pick up my clothes
from the floor.

Dash off to the movies
and not wash a dish.
I'll plead for allowance
whenever I wish.
I'll stuff up the plumbing
and deluge the floor.
As soon as they've mopped it,
I'll flood it some more.

When they correct me,
I'll lie down and cry,
Kicking and screaming,
not a tear in my eye.
I'll take all their pencils
and flashlights, and then
When they buy new ones,
I'll take them again.

I'll spill glasses of milk
to complete every meal,
Eat my banana and
just drop the peel.
Put toys on the table,
spill jam on the floor,
I'll break lots of dishes
as though I were four.

What fun I shall have,
what joy it will be,
to live with my children....
the way they lived with me!

[ Author Unknown -- from Owen Lorion ]